I often think, what are the parameters of relationships with a person? He/she belongs to our family? Being together a long period? Physical attraction? Habits which suite with ours? Or well behaving? Difficult to say… Some relations are much too wonderful for words… I can explain them with three different types of relations as example.

I have three friends at Chennai – the capital city of the State Tamil Nadu, in India. My relation with each of them is very different.

First guy was my class mate in college days, Mr. Kitt Naveen Tom Jose – A knowledgeable and down to earth young man with a very positive attitude and respectable personality. He is a chartered accountant by profession and works in Cognizant Technologies, as a finance analyst. He loved and married my another friend – Mrs. Shinta Kitt – and they living happily at Chennai with their new born baby boy. His sister was a friend of my sister and his mother was my Physics professor and Vice Principal of the college at the time of my graduation in Mathematics. A very deep relation evolved naturally by years, and no room for surprise for class mates become very good friends.

When ever personal problems came, I just phone him and talk ten to fifteen minutes. After the conversation, I feel – even the problem exists there just as before – my mind is calm and ready to face the challenge. Often I don’t share my real issue with him, but just talk various things. But, a casual talking with him makes me much comfortable.

You are lucky, if you have a friend-who can make you feel good when you are in real trouble.

*****

The second one is a young lady – Ms. Meera Lakshminarayanan – a Brahmin girl from Guruvayur. I met her first in a train journey to Bangalore, in October 2005.  I have been travelling with my family (my father, mom and sister) on Island Express from Kanyakumari to Bangalore. In a six berth coupe, my family and I got four berths. Two young women from Ernakulam South Station occupied the remaining two berths – one was a tall, slim, long haired woman with a spectacle and other was short and fair complexioned and a bit more fatty than her friend. During the whole night travelling we did not talked any thing. They were talking something and we were in our world. From Trissur station two girl students get in to the compartment. They had booked the seat but, the tickets were not confirmed. But, the students had no option but go by the train as their class would start the next day. Because of the rush and insecurity feeling in general compartment they get in to our coupe and asked permission to travel in that coupe that night. None of us had any problem in it. Around 10 O’clock in the night we climbed up to our berths. Then, the two young ladies offered one of their berths to the two girls and they shared the other. ‘So compassionate and supportive young women’ I thought. Next morning, we got down at the White Field Station, Bangalore. While waiting for the car of my friend, my mother said “Very well behaving young women with compassion to others”. We all agreed to her.

After two days, I was travelling from ‘Madiwala’ to ‘Domlur’ by a city transport bus. From ‘Koramangala’, the two young ladies got in to the bus, and sat on a seats near to mine. I recognized them immediately –the compassionate young women travelled with us two days before. The tall girl (Meera) identified me too; she asked pointing her right hand index finger to me “You… train… ”

I smiled and replied “Yea, we were in the same coupe…” I paused and continued “I’m Mahesh…”

“Well, I am Meera, and this is my friend Praseetha”, She replied…

After some chit chat, they get down at air port road junction. They were working in a famous airline company. We had exchanged our e-mail Id’s and later communicated. The meeting had grown up to friendship through mails and phone calls.

Years passed… I moved to Kochi, Praseetha got married (now living happily in Dubai with husband and a cute baby boy) and Meera shifted to Chennai. I address her “Meerajee” and she calls me “Mahesh Bhai”. Last night- just before writing this post- I asked her permission to use her real name and identity in my blog. She replied “No problem, I know you are a real gentle man, and will not misuse my name.” – The greatest appreciation ever, a friend shall get… I thanked her for the confidence on me.

In fact, these kinds of trusts of our dear people make our life worth to live.

*****

My third friend at Chennai – Mrs. Valsala Menon – is a Senior Journalist. Work with the “Ability” – the official magazine of Ability Foundation as the associate editor. The Ability Foundation is a charitable trust and social working organization founded for the development of physically or mentally challenged people. Film Actress-Director Revathi is one of the trustees of the ‘Ability’.

Valsala Aunty is a writer, social worker, dancer, activist, special correspondent for Small Enterprise India and more over a lady with a positive attitude to life. She has a family of family journalists- her husband Mr. Hari Haranandanan is a very senior journalist (Sports editor) in “The Times of India”, Chennai. Their only daughter, Niranjana (Ninjoo) -a girl with creative mind- is studying for graduation in journalism.

Every morning, I wake up seeing a motivating SMS with a Good morning from Valsala Aunty. What ever be the issues, I can talk to her, she is a very matured lady and one of my very good supporters.

The relation between Aunty and me is something eternal… No blood relation, not in the same age group, not from the same industry, not meeting often… no reasons to say… But, she is a wonderful friend of mine.

See, my three friends in the same city, from different cultural background, different way of being friends, different age groups, different area of expertise and job… Still I have a warm relation with them all…

I believe, the relationship with a person is beyond definitions. Our heart decides who is good for us…